Welcome to Social Media 101. This listing is a collection of my thoughts based on observations I’ve made while surfing the internet.
Here are a few things to keep in mind as you journey through the vast and wonderful world of the internet.
1. No one owes you anything. This includes:
If you post a status, comment, or update and you don’t get the number of likes, comments or responses you’d like, don’t have a meltdown. People have lives. Social media is jam packed full of virtual cacophony. Most of your friends aren’t sitting in front of a computer screen twenty-four hours a day, waiting for your every inane utterance, complaint, or musing.
2. Stop sharing pictures of yourself on the toilet or updates on your bathroom habits.
Everyone performs bodily functions. Updating us on your fecal situation, or to show us how your cat sits in your underwear while you take a dump isn’t necessary. We don’t need to know that much about you. It’s not, “edgy,” it’s just, blah.
3. Stop fishing. Examples include:
- Posting photos of yourself in full makeup and showing off your best angle with captions like: “I’m ugly.” “Just me, be nice, no makeup.”
- Typing leading statuses like: “I’m so tired of it all.” “No one cares.” “I hate this.” When someone asks, “What’s wrong?” You reply with: “I don’t want to talk about it.” Bull hockery, you liar. People who don’t want to talk about something don’t, and they certainly don’t post statuses about “it” either. There’s a word for people like this: phony.
- Announcing mass deletions of friends/blocking of followers.
Just do it. If those people are useless, they won’t even know they’ve been deleted, unfriended, or blocked. The only reason I can fathom to make an announcement is to see if the masses will jump to get back in your good graces. Who do you think you are? The online Pope? Prince? Get gone!
4. Stop PhotoShopping everything!
Most of the people on your friends list have seen not just you, but your family in real life. We know your eye color, body size, car, house, etc. You are not making an avatar, just post your photos and keep it moving. Keep posting fakes and eventually you’ll be outted.
5. Building from number four, stop trying to fool people into thinking you’re someone you’re not. AKA, “catfishing.” There is an illusion of anonymity on the internet. Please understand, if someone wants to find you, they will, and if you’ve invented stories about who you are and what you do, the results can be embarrassing for everyone involved.
6. If you resort to name calling, you’ve already lost.
For some reason, millions of people feel compelled to comment online about any and everything in an attempt to whip people into a frenzy. These folks are known as trolls. There are all kinds of trolls online:
- Those who disagree with everything just for the heck of it.
- Those who seem to dislike everything no matter what.
- Those who chime in with irrelevant information.
- Those who bring in derogatory, hateful, or sexist statements.
And then there are those who can’t complete a sentence without calling someone a name. If you cannot converse without attacking, you are useless in the discussion. Your entire point is invalidated because you are no longer rational, and are therefore, easily dismissed.
7. Just because you have an opinion, doesn’t mean you are right.
8. Just because someone disagrees with you, doesn’t mean they’re wrong.
9. Learn to write coherently in your primary language.
10. You don’t get to approve of someone else’s lifestyle. If someone lives differently than you do, they will continue to do so. Stating, “I don’t approve of homosexuality/interracial marriage/immigration. etc.” is meaningless. You are not the determining factor in the way people choose to exist. Statements like these only show one thing, prejudice.
What do you think? Should I add a Social Media 102 post?